Monday, December 4, 2017

Advent Challenge 2017 Day 4 - Music

Write about a special song or how music affects your emotions.

Music speaks to me in a way that nothing else ever has.  It evokes such emotion, such longing, such intense feelings.  Sometimes those are so strong that I wish I could hide from them and from everyone around me who’s witnessing my reaction.  

For obvious reasons songs that are played at emotional times are often very hard for me to listen to for years to come. One that we had a Cole’s funeral that is emotion provoking for me is How Great Thou Art….especially this particular version.  I don’t make it through without crying but it’s become less about the memories of hearing it while we celebrated Cole’s brief life and more about just how awesome our God is. Over the years I've been able to make it til this particular part of the song before my voice catches, before the tears start to fall....

When Christ shall come
With shouts of acclamation
And take me home
What joy shall fill my heart

Then I shall bow
With humble adoration
And then proclaim
My God How great Thou art

Then sings my soul
My Savior, God, to Thee
How great Thou art
How great Thou art

My soul truly does sing (and my eyes tear up) when I think about this just how amazing it will be that Jesus will come to take me home, just how blessed we are to have salvation.

At Christmas time it’s usually Silent Night that gets me right in the feels.  I’ve had two experiences at Christmas Eve services with this song and the candle lighting that goes with it.  The first was a number of years ago, when Cam was still a baby/toddler and I was holding him on my lap.  I clearly felt weight/pressure on the opposite to where Cam was sitting and felt so connected to Cole, so sure he was sitting there too.  Two years ago I blogged about an experience with Silent Night. It wasn’t the same experience but it was visioning, feelings that hearing words from this song connected me to.  I was filled with peace despite tears streaming down my cheeks.  


Not all songs are evoke emotions that include sadness.  The song ‘I can only imagine’ by Mercy Me has been quite a turning point for me in my faith and in my journey to find hope.  Later this week I’ll write about the hope that came to me in giving my heart to Jesus...hope about seeing my son again. That’s what kept me going back in those early, raw days...the hope of salvation to the place where Cole was.  Essentially it was more about Cole and being reunited than it was about a life in paradise after my life here was done.  
And then I heard this song.

"I Can Only Imagine" I can only imagine what it will be like When I walk by your side I can only imagine what my eyes will see When your face is before me I can only imagine Yeah Surrounded by your glory What will my heart feel? Will I dance for you, Jesus, Or in awe of you be still? Will I stand in your presence Or to my knees will I fall? Will I sing hallelujah? Will I be able to speak at all? I can only imagine I can only imagine I can only imagine when that day comes And I find myself standing in the sun I can only imagine when all I will do Is forever, forever worship you I can only imagine, yeah I can only imagine Surrounded by your glory What will my heart feel? Will I dance for you, Jesus, Or in awe of you be still? Will I stand in your presence Or to my knees will I fall? Will I sing hallelujah? Will I be able to speak at all? I can only imagine Yeah I can only imagine

 A few years ago I wrote about my experience with this song and how much it changed the way I viewed heaven.  I look back now and I realize how immature in my faith I was before this...that heaven was a place for reuniting with people from my life on earth instead of reuniting me my father in heaven.  I don’t remember all of the emotional reactions I had when the realization that heaven was so much greater, so much more than just a reunion.  Rapture and joy accompanied by tears of happiness I think.  

Music is truly a gift from God and I pray that everyone can use it to connect to those emotional places that need healing and hope.  




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